The Best Parenting Decision I Ever Made? Surrounding Myself With Other Good Parents

When I first became a parent, I was laser-focused on the basics — feeding, sleep schedules, childproofing the house. My days were filled with checklists, routines, and Googling everything under the sun. What I didn’t realize back then was that one of the most important parenting decisions I’d ever make had nothing to do with baby gear or discipline strategies.

It was choosing who I let into my life.

I stumbled into it at first. A quick chat with another mom at storytime. A dad I kept bumping into at the park. We bonded over things like sleep regressions and toddler tantrums, but slowly those conversations grew deeper — into values, fears, hopes, and how utterly overwhelming parenting can feel sometimes.

Looking back, those relationships saved me.

There’s something uniquely powerful about being surrounded by other good parents. Not perfect parents. Not ones who have everything figured out. But the ones who are honest, who care deeply, and who are trying their best every single day. That kind of environment shapes you more than any parenting book ever could.

Over the years, I’ve noticed three clear reasons why surrounding myself with good parents made me a better one:

1. They normalize the struggle.

In our most vulnerable moments, it’s easy to feel like we’re the only ones getting it wrong. But when you're around parents who are real about their challenges — whether it’s losing patience, juggling work and family, or dealing with teen drama — you stop carrying so much shame. You start realizing that struggle isn’t a sign of failure; it’s just part of the job.

2. They help you raise your standards — gently.

Being around thoughtful, intentional parents who lead with love makes you want to show up better too. You catch yourself being more present, more curious, more creative in how you handle tough situations. And when you slip up, these are the people who remind you to show yourself grace and get back on track.

3. They model what we want for our kids.

Our children learn from everything we do — including how we build community. When they see us investing in friendships, offering support, and receiving help in return, they begin to understand what healthy relationships look like. That’s a gift we give them without even realizing it.

I’ve had some of the most important parenting conversations standing on the sidelines at soccer practice or folding chairs after a school event. None of us were trying to be experts. We were just showing up — for our kids, for each other, and for ourselves.

If you’re in a season where parenting feels isolating or overwhelming, I want to encourage you: seek out good parents. Say yes to the playdate invite. Introduce yourself to the quiet dad at pickup. Join the mom who always looks like she’s barely holding it together (she probably is — and she’ll get you).

Parenting wasn’t meant to be a solo journey. And surrounding yourself with good people who care as much as you do? That’s one of the best moves you can make — for your kids, and for yourself.